- [ Preroll advert ]
- [crowd cheers]
- RTX! RTX!
- [crowd cheers]
- [ Media begins ]
- [marching music]
Cameron Campbell: Fun!
Campbell (overlay): LEGITIMATE
Campbell: These are the words that could be said
- to describe the thrilling adven-
Campbell (overlay): SUMMERS
- - you could have at Camp Campbell!
Campbell: Hello there! My name is Cameron
- Campbell, roguishly handsome entrepreneur,
- world famous adventurer, and founder of Camp Campbell.
Campbell: Ask your parents about me.
Campbell: I guess you could say I've spent my years living life to the fullest,
Campbell: and it's high time I shared my adventures with the future.
Campbell: No, I'm not a time traveler. I'm of course talking about the children.
Campbell: Just like you and little Davey here.
Campbell: What do you say, sport? Are you ready to
- have some fun?
Davey (reading off of script): Boy am I, Mr. Campbell! But what kind of fun did you have in mind?
Davey: How was tha-
Campbell: We've got all kinds of fun activities, from hiking to archery, and even more in between.
Campbell: Here's a short list now.
Campbell: Think it can't get any better? Think again, idiot!
Campbell: Camp Campbell is equipped with the
- finest facilities,
- and cutting-edge 20th century technology.
- [splash and panicked yelling in the distance]
Campbell: Hey, save some fun for the rest of us!
Campbell: We've also enlisted a highly trained
- staff that are kind, caring, and above all,
- not threatening in the slightest.
Quartermaster: ARGH! Get back here so I can threaten you little s-
Campbell: And speaking of staffers, here's one now!
(voice off camera): pst, Gwen!
Gwen: Uh, yeah, I'm Gwen, hi.
Gwen (after being prodded): JESUS, WHAT-
David: How do I look, Max?
Max (off camera): Good.
David: Framing's all right?
David: Are you sure?
Max: David, it's good!
David: Okay, okay...
Campbell: Yes, Camp Campbell truly has everything. All that's missing now, is you!
Campbell: So be sure to throw a tantrum until your parents sign you up for a camp-tastic summer
- at Cameron Campbell's Camp Campbell summer camp!
Campbell: We'll be seeing you soon!
- And remember...
- Campe Diem!
David: That was perfect!
Daivd: Gwen, did you see it?! That was on public
- access! Public access!
David: Ohh, this is gonna be the best summer ever!
Max: This is the worst summer ever.
Campbell: Damn fine work on those edits, Davey! Really saved a boatload on reshoots.
Campbell: Hey, is it too late to add video editing camp?
Campbell: I just got an idea for a lucrative yet
- morally grey way to make more commercials...